We woke up to -11 degree wind chills this morning and a house whose boiler still can’t  keep up with the cold, even hours into the morning. Thankfully, John built a fire in the woodstove first thing, and while I drank another cup of coffee and waited for the fire to send its warmth as far as my chair, I remembered a movie that John and I watched many months ago. I can’t remember the title, but my take-away was that everyday life is filled with tiny moments of joy. You just have to be open to seeing them. Having a rather severe case of cabin fever doesn’t help one immediately see tiny moments of joy, so I sat shivering under three layers of clothing very deliberately searching back over the past month to find some.

I found the right words to say what I want!

One of the wonderful strings of tiny moments of joy in February comes because there is time to read. Both John and I read a book by James Rebanks this winter titled Pastoral Song. Rebanks’ narrative weaves beautifully detailed moments from his past growing up on his grandfather’s and father’s farms with a historical chronicle of the farming industry and the destruction it has wrought on the Earth. His final section weaves his family’s work in re-claiming their farm from the production mentality that has swallowed so many family farms in Britain and the US. As I read further and further into the book, I began to realize that Rebanks was narrating exactly what John and I envision for our farm ~ a biodiverse space where relationships among all species work in service of the best life for all. We actually knew that. What we didn’t know was how to say the vision in a condensed way that would allow us to begin creating those lists of “Things We Need To Figure Out.”  Since we’ve finished that book, this list has grown really long, really fast. But at least now we have a list!  

Our fox came back!

One particularly sunny February day, Vega and I braved the sub-zero temperatures to take a quick stroll around the barns. As soon as we approached the back of The Big Barn, I saw a hole, around which was a lot of freshly dug out dirt. We didn’t stick around long because Vega went slightly nuts from whatever she was scenting, but I was so happy to think about the baby foxes that we would soon see!  This particular tiny moment of joy, though, was immediately followed by a sinking feeling in my stomach because the very last thing I want is a confrontation between our Mamma Fox and Steve and Dave. John filled in the hole with rocks, and we’ve not seen any evidence that she’s been back since then. But thinking about her returning to our farm was a definite tiny moment of joy! 

There are woodpeckers here! 

We moved to our farm from a suburban neighborhood where, for over 20 years, I rescued dogs and thoroughly enjoyed watching the variety of birds that came to our birdfeeders.  I especially loved the woodpeckers. We had five of the eight native Michigan woodpecker species visiting us almost daily ~ including a pair of Pileated Woodpeckers who didn’t come every day, but who were just amazing to watch when they did visit. When we moved to the farm, it was disconcerting to discover that there were nowhere near the same number of birds, nor the same species of birds around me every day.  So we put up one of our birdfeeders ~ and the woodpeckers came! Not many, mind you ~ I’ve only seen two or three Red Bellies, one Hairy and two or three Downeys, but they’re here! Every time I see them, I smile. 

Two stalls are built!

I definitely had more than one tiny moment of joy when I put the last screw into the second stall and knew that all we had left for them was to build and attach two gates. Now I do know that a stall really isn’t complete until it actually has a gate, but I’m thinking about our rehabbing work in stages ~ and the first stage is done! John and I joke that twenty years from now, we’ll look back in either puzzlement or amazement on all the days we worked with power tools in a truly freezing barn, getting ready for Sundance’s opening. Today, though, it makes me smile to walk past the stalls and know that we’re that much closer to welcoming a spirit who needs us. 

Tiny moments of joy. They do make us smile, even among freezing cabin fever-induced grumblings. One thing I noticed, though, is that even in these moments of smiling, there is balance in my universe. Words found ~ A longer To-Do list. Momma Fox remembered ~ potential conflict with Steve and Dave. Two stalls are built ~ a gentle animal will need them. Balance. What a wonderful reminder on this very cold day.